This Just In: Baseball in 2025 Sucks!
Let the record show that I lasted two and a half innings on opening day before I relinquished my status as a devoted baseball fan.
The current version of baseball is not just bad; it’s unwatchable.
How are you doing it, people?
How are you gazing at this excruciating game of catch without nodding off or, worse, giving up entirely?
I have been a baseball fan for – gulp – 70 years, and never has the game been less entertaining than it is right now. This swing-hard-in-case-you-hit it style requires none of the elements that held baseball’s appeal to me – the simple art of playing a beautiful sport.
In that opening game in Washington, 13 of the first 15 batters struck out, on route to an implausible 32 Ks in 10 innings. The Phillies whiffed 19 times, an average of almost two every inning.
And the Phillies are hardly alone in this HR-or-bust approach. The Yankees, with their new analytics-designed “torpedo” bats, clubbed 15 homers in a three-game sweep of Milwaukee. Ugh.
Chicks dig the long ball, or so the saying goes, but old men (me) prefer an artful hit-and-run, a diving catch in the outfield, or – perish the thought – a perfectly-executed drag bunt.
In 1960 baseball unveiled a TV show called Home Run Derby. Future Hall of Famers Willie Mays, Mickey Mantle and Hank Aaron all participated. The contests were held in a charming ballpark modeled after Wrigley Field. The winner each week received a check for $2,000.
Despite all of that star power, the series was so boring, it was cancelled after one season. Now, MLB holds one Home Run Derby a season, at the All-Star Game. It seems mildly entertaining only in comparison to the putrid game itself the next night.
Look, I realize that the Phillies are a good team with a legitimate chance to win the World Series this year. I can see that a surprising number of younger fans are filling the seats at Citizens Park Bank these days. Some people live for this stuff.
Not me. Not anymore. I will still watch, sporadically. I will still comment on who’s doing well and who’s letting us down, in case anyone cares what I think.
But as an everyday, every-pitch fan, I’m done.
At least for me, baseball in 2025 has already struck out.
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The firing of John Tortorella as head coach of the Flyers was more a mercy-killing than a cold dismissal. After nearly three seasons of a fruitless rebuild, the veteran coach was making it clear in his public comments that he had had enough.
Tortorella’s exact words that prompted his firing by GM Danny Briere were: “I’m not really interested in learning how to coach in this type of season.”
There were two alarming implications in that simple collection of words. First, it shows pretty clearly that Tortorella did not believe in Briere’s rebuild. And second, it qualifies as the only interesting thing anyone associated with the Flyers has said all season.
The departure of Tortorella leaves the Flyers with zero compelling figures in the organization. I fully realize that I am including my former co-host Keith Jones, who can be very interesting and fun, though he has shown no inclination to be so since moving from radio to the team’s presidency.
Jonesy is not asking my advice – the man is not insane – but I will offer it here anyway. Briere saying he hopes the firing of Tortorella is “rock bottom” for the Flyers is not assuring to anyone. Apparently not even the GM knows where the bottom is in an organization that last won a Stanley Cup 50 years ago.
It’s terrible to have a team that can’t even make the playoffs in the NHL, where exactly half the teams do so. It’s even worse when the people associated with the club are boring.
Is there any reason for a young fan to adopt the Flyers?
When is the team going to give its fans a reason to care?
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Some other idle thoughts. . . . .
- If a team other than the Eagles had mastered the Tush Push, how would we feel about it? I don’t think the unique QB sneak should be outlawed, but that’s only because my team executes it better than anyone else. Otherwise, I’m pretty sure I would hate it.
- The blatant tanking by the Sixers these days has rendered mute all of the talk by the morons who extolled The Process a decade ago. You see, the whole point was, this would not have to happen, maybe ever again, if the team just dug itself out of its hole by losing on purpose for a few seasons. And speaking of holes, where has ex-GM Sam Hinkie been hiding all these years?
- The untold story of this off-season for the Eagles has been the way it has been willing to lose important players for the sake of a more favorable salary-cap situation. At last count, the Birds were still $18 million under the cap. Now GM Howie Roseman is counting on the draft to fill all of the holes created by free agency. Good luck with that.
- I’m going to say what lots of Phillies fans are thinking but won’t say in these days of sympathetic sports talk. Trea Turner is one of the worst free-agent signings in Philadelphia sports history. He took the collar in the opener and then missed the next two games with a bum back. In case you forgot, Turner has nine years left on his $300-million, fully guaranteed contract.
- The most entertaining NFL story so far this off-season is the never-ending drama surrounding former star QB Aaron Rodgers, now a free agent after a disastrous two seasons with the Jets. Aaron appears to be playing hard-to-get these days. This is a very dubious strategy since it appears that no one actually wants him. Couldn’t happen to a nicer guy.